Alex "Deport me already" Denisenko,
Alex "Deport me already" Denisenko, Jen "Bye bye, suckers" Boonlorn, Ryan "Out like a fat chick playin' dodge ball" Hyland, Ben "Big Air" Engelby and Bradley "Later Dudes" Davidson have all graduated college. True, grades won't be back for another week or so, but they'll probably all squeak by.
I've decided we should throw them a party because face it, they have each overcome severe physical and mental handicaps and they deserve a celebration. Sure, we might regret our decision to celebrate their accomplishments if they get haughty about the whole thing, but hopefully we'll all be drunk and amicable at that point. I'll bring the bibs for the graduates.
Show up this Wednesday at my apartment around 10pm for one chill evening with the ukazu crew. I've planned a sendoff for our graduates and it will be a raucous good time for all. There won't be any strippers, clowns, or ventriloquists, but that doesn't mean there won't be entertainment. The posse will represent and we'll all chuckle to the point of incontinence. Fun!
You will be admitted upon presentation of a six pack of chilled beverages. We're all broke, but everyone can wrangle up a six pack. If you really don't have six bucks, just find a convenience store with a non-aggression policy and run like hell (JUST KIDDING. Don't do it, Focker.). Alcohol is a smart choice if you're a drinker, but if you're one of those who chooses not to swish the naughty sauce don't think you're off the hook -- I better see some ginger ale or something. Bring a drink you enjoy, but plan on sharing. We're not the kind of crowd to write our names in magic marker on our six packs before putting them in the fridge and if I see you hugging your stash of sweet social acceptance instead of mingling I'm gonna steal it for the community stockpile.
See you Wednesday, nerds.